Showing posts with label bloging. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bloging. Show all posts
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
My Birthday
This is out of order but it has to be in here.
My 57th birthday was the best ever, my friends set me up for a surprise birthday party, Marie started setting me up like three weeks before hand, I was supposed to pick up LouAnne at the foot doctors office because Marie may still be up in Bullhead working, so i went down to pick LouAnne up a little before 5pm, i am almost always on time or before, I pulled into the parking lot and they were no cars there at all but when i say i am going to do something i do it, i think it was about 10 after and here comes LouAnne driving up, she gets out and starts telling me the foot was not as bad as they thought so she got out early and went to the pharmacy to pick up meds but now she needed to take them with food and could not wait for dinner (Marie was going to take me to dinner for my birthday)so she rode with me to a pizza house, again no cars in the parking lot, went in and surprise, they totally got me, it was great.
After we went to coffee at starbucks for a little while, then we went to B.J's bar Marie and myself played four games of pool, when we were leaving this women that had made a remark about me when she walked in with friends tried to get us to dance with her but we had to go, so she asked for a picture with us then she wanted an email address so i gave her my card, we left the bar LouAnne and Marie went home and i did too, about 1am i got this phone call and it was that women, she wanted me and my girl friends to come down to her house and party, well i knew that my friends would not want to go so she said i could just go and i did, i had a nice time, my first lesbian sex ever.
Best birthday ever.
2 Years
You know it's only 2 years that i have known that i was a transsexual, 2 years and i look back at all that i have done in those 2 years and how my life has changed, what will happen in the next 2 years.
So what am i going to do, well one is i will be moving sometime, don't know where to but it will be to somewhere that i can be more social, no more living out in the boondocks for me. I have a lot of work to do on my voice, I have to learn how to dance, how to cook much better, do my makeup and hair better, start getting some nice outfits and this is the biggest thing i think i need to do, that is learn how to sell myself as a person that people will like.
So what am i going to do, well one is i will be moving sometime, don't know where to but it will be to somewhere that i can be more social, no more living out in the boondocks for me. I have a lot of work to do on my voice, I have to learn how to dance, how to cook much better, do my makeup and hair better, start getting some nice outfits and this is the biggest thing i think i need to do, that is learn how to sell myself as a person that people will like.
Going Good
Up until the last post things have been going really good, I guess the more i do the more chances there are for things to go wrong, I have been so busy that i have not updated this in a while, life is really looking up like last Saturday night, one of my girl friends was in town visiting one of her boy friends, i met up with them at a bar, we all went to another one, then at closing we went to Lenny's then to they house where i had the first ever three some with a man and a women, wasn't the best, you know how guys are after drinking.
Then there was the dinner date that i got stood up on.
Next week i have a date in Vegas, this one is just for sex only, can't wait.
I have another women that wants me bad, haven't set up a date yet.
November i have kind of a date in Phoenix who i will be showing the ropes too, they are only 21.
I am not going to waist the few years i have left.
Then there was the dinner date that i got stood up on.
Next week i have a date in Vegas, this one is just for sex only, can't wait.
I have another women that wants me bad, haven't set up a date yet.
November i have kind of a date in Phoenix who i will be showing the ropes too, they are only 21.
I am not going to waist the few years i have left.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Still not doing too much due to the lack of money right now but this is about some things that happened in the last 2 days.
Sunday i went to Dillard's, i had an appointment at the Mac counter to try some new makeup, even though i always buy something(that's the idea i know) i still can't pass it up because i always learn more about makeup. they sure can make you look good.
After running around the rest of the day and waiting until bed time to take the makeup off i was trying to take it off and it would just not come off, i wiped and washed and rubbed, it would just come off, that's when i realized that it had come off and that was my skin i was looking at.
Last night i went out and met the GLBTS group at Hastings for coffee and to see two friends before they go back home, had mentioned something about going to a bar after-ward's because when i drive to town i like to make it a night, well that's what happened.
I had on one of my favorite short boob showing dresses and my new 5 inch heels, so i was ready. after about half hour we picked a bar, not much for fun bars here in havasu and it was a Monday night, well you all got there and of course it was quite, what we didn't know was that Karaoke started at 9pm along with happy hour, things started picking up with more people and music, we were just talking and all that and i was talking with friends about the normal trans stuff, like being in a place like that and if i looked ok, were people looking at me because i looked good or were they thinking i looked like a guy, you just never know what people are thinking. sometimes your friends do things that if you knew about them before hand you would just run and hide, we had noticed one older guy that had been watching me, well my one friend had gone up to him and said why don't you go ask her to dance (me) he told my friend that i was too cute to dance with him. another time he asked another friend if he would introduce us to these two women that had been looking at me which he did, turned out they were admiring my legs. I had just come off the dance floor and this women came up to me and said how gorgeous i was and could she ask me a personal question, i said sure as always, she said "my friends and i were having an argument about whether or not you were a man" so i told her i was trans and that now i was a women, she was totally surprised, then her friend came over and they seemed to love it, we went out and danced together and while we were out dancing this guy came up, this guy had been watching me all night too, he had been singing Karaoke when I was in the back of the room playing pool with a friend and remarking about me on the mic(all good stuff) he was with a group of 5 guys and 1 girl, anyway he came and butted in on the dance floor and started dancing with me so i went with it, that's when the girl from their group came and pulled him away, not sure what that was about but you know what i was guessing.
It was a really good night, i enjoyed it even though i was read, i can handle it so long as i don't get into trouble.
Sunday i went to Dillard's, i had an appointment at the Mac counter to try some new makeup, even though i always buy something(that's the idea i know) i still can't pass it up because i always learn more about makeup. they sure can make you look good.
After running around the rest of the day and waiting until bed time to take the makeup off i was trying to take it off and it would just not come off, i wiped and washed and rubbed, it would just come off, that's when i realized that it had come off and that was my skin i was looking at.
Last night i went out and met the GLBTS group at Hastings for coffee and to see two friends before they go back home, had mentioned something about going to a bar after-ward's because when i drive to town i like to make it a night, well that's what happened.
I had on one of my favorite short boob showing dresses and my new 5 inch heels, so i was ready. after about half hour we picked a bar, not much for fun bars here in havasu and it was a Monday night, well you all got there and of course it was quite, what we didn't know was that Karaoke started at 9pm along with happy hour, things started picking up with more people and music, we were just talking and all that and i was talking with friends about the normal trans stuff, like being in a place like that and if i looked ok, were people looking at me because i looked good or were they thinking i looked like a guy, you just never know what people are thinking. sometimes your friends do things that if you knew about them before hand you would just run and hide, we had noticed one older guy that had been watching me, well my one friend had gone up to him and said why don't you go ask her to dance (me) he told my friend that i was too cute to dance with him. another time he asked another friend if he would introduce us to these two women that had been looking at me which he did, turned out they were admiring my legs. I had just come off the dance floor and this women came up to me and said how gorgeous i was and could she ask me a personal question, i said sure as always, she said "my friends and i were having an argument about whether or not you were a man" so i told her i was trans and that now i was a women, she was totally surprised, then her friend came over and they seemed to love it, we went out and danced together and while we were out dancing this guy came up, this guy had been watching me all night too, he had been singing Karaoke when I was in the back of the room playing pool with a friend and remarking about me on the mic(all good stuff) he was with a group of 5 guys and 1 girl, anyway he came and butted in on the dance floor and started dancing with me so i went with it, that's when the girl from their group came and pulled him away, not sure what that was about but you know what i was guessing.
It was a really good night, i enjoyed it even though i was read, i can handle it so long as i don't get into trouble.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Getting up to date
I am a little behind on keeping this blog up to date so I will just go over what I have done in the last month.
Got back to the U.S on June 29th, Marie and Loanne met me at Planet Hollywood, we didn't have a lot of time but we did go out to eat and had a nice time.
The next day we left around 11am, I had to be home cause I had a preop appointment at 4pm in Havasu, would have liked to stay in Vegas a little longer, I want to go back there to do some shopping when I have money.
Tried to go to my appointment but on my way in to town I got a call canceling it, I finally got it done 3 appointments later on the next Monday.
Think all I did the rest of the week was rest up and I did start walking to help getting back into shape.
Friday was the other big day I had been waiting for the last 3 months, I drove down to Marie's house and then she drove me down to the surgery center for my BA, not sure how long I was there, I think about 3 hours of course I don't remember much because of the drugs, Marie picked me up from recovery and took me back to her house where I stayed for a few hours before I felt good enough to drive home, there was no pain just a little bit sore and I know I was not supposed to drive but I felt fine, I love Marie but there is no place like home, the next two days were resting only, Monday all I had to do was go in and get my new boobs checked out and the ace bandage off which was replaced with a sports bra, this was the first I got to look at my 600cc boobs, wow they are so big, so high and tight, in a few months they will be much nicer.
The next day I went for a lab test to check my hormones and then I went for Taco Tuesday at Marie's, Friday was my second post op with the doctor, this whole week I was so tired from the surgery, all I did at home was lay a round, the next week was about the same thing with Taco's on Tuesday and another check up on the boobs. oh one more thing I did go to see my work doctor for my permission to go back to work slip which I got with no problem, I just have to go back to see him after working for 2 weeks.
The last week I went to Phoenix for more electrolysis (never ends) I have not had any in two months so I thought it may be a little harder but 40 hours that sucked, it's a good job I like the people or I would hate it.
Saw my hormone doctor for a check up on that and went to see my hair person on Thursday after electrolysis.
Went to a friends house on Thursday had pizza and talked, a really nice evening.
Got home Friday afternoon and stayed home all weekend to rest up for my first shift back at work in 2 months.
My ex-wife called me on Sunday with some good news, she got remarried which means no more support payments to her, this is something I never thought would happen.
My first shift went good, we only had one call which was a roll over so I did not have much hard work to do, sat around and caught up on EMS courses on the computer.
Nobody has asked me anything about my surgery's all they ask is how I am doing, I don't think I want to know what they say behind my back.
That petty much brings us up to date, I just completed my second shift back at work with no problems so I think I am good to go and there should be no new problems unless I make them, my SRS is healing good as is my BA, the next few months I will be trying to get back in shape, saving money for my next appointment for face lift in January and of course electrolysis.
My Trip Home
Monday, July 5, 2010 at 9:18pm
The trip home was not something that I was looking forward to mostly because I was leaving my new friends.
My day started at 3 am, dilated and then got ready to go, had one last person to say goodbye to before Danny would be there to take me to the airport.
I knew it was going to be a long day on the way to the airport because I was already hurting, we arrived at the airport on time, Danny loaded the bags on a cart and we went to the JAL ticket window, I had already called 2 days before to confirm the flight and make the wheelchair request, the only thing the lady asked me was why I needed a wheelchair, I just said surgery, didn't have to show the doctors letter, So I said goodbye to Danny and sat down to wait for my wheelchair, the wheelchair was something hard for me to do, everybody looks at you more, I just looked straight ahead and tried not to look at anybody in the eye.
The wheelchair service was really nice, all the people were nice too, one of the best parts was that I did not have to know where I was going, they all knew the way of course and the other part was that we jumped all the lines, the security check points were different too, I got wheeled through two of them and got patted down on the other side, at LA they asked if I could walk through which I did, the only bad thing about the wheelchair was that it made me sit down for more hours, I think the whole trip took about 20 hours.
The first plane ride to Japan on JAL was nice, the flight attendants on JAL even carried my bags aboard for me, not like when I walked aboard the American Airlines flight, being the first on the plane I saw the flight attendants looking at magazines in the back, not that I needed the help but it just show the difference, I will chose a foreign airline when ever I can for any flights in the future.
They changed the seats for me on the plane from Japan to Dallas, they moved me to the first row of the cattle car section because of more leg room, that was nice at least, the only trouble with that is it is also the row where they put the baby's which there were three of, they screamed for 3/4's of the 11 hour flight so no sleeping for me, the good part of that was that the row in front of us was the back row of business section, these guys paid a lot more for the seats but still had to listen to the kids, it did make me smile. The seat I had looked straight the aisle so I watched how the other half live, business class sure drinks a lot.
When we were about an hour from landing the pilot came over the intercom and told us that about half way through the flight there was a mechanical problem with the plane which caused them to fly at a lower altitude and that made the plane use more fuel so we did not have enough fuel to reach Dallas and that we were going to land at LA instead, that worked out good for me because I was able to get a flight direct to Las Vegas which put me in there two hours earlier, if I had not changed flights they would have sent me to Dallas to catch my plane back to Vegas.
That was my trip home, hard but what choice was there, I would do it again in a heart beat for the most wonderful experience I have ever had.
The trip home was not something that I was looking forward to mostly because I was leaving my new friends.
My day started at 3 am, dilated and then got ready to go, had one last person to say goodbye to before Danny would be there to take me to the airport.
I knew it was going to be a long day on the way to the airport because I was already hurting, we arrived at the airport on time, Danny loaded the bags on a cart and we went to the JAL ticket window, I had already called 2 days before to confirm the flight and make the wheelchair request, the only thing the lady asked me was why I needed a wheelchair, I just said surgery, didn't have to show the doctors letter, So I said goodbye to Danny and sat down to wait for my wheelchair, the wheelchair was something hard for me to do, everybody looks at you more, I just looked straight ahead and tried not to look at anybody in the eye.
The wheelchair service was really nice, all the people were nice too, one of the best parts was that I did not have to know where I was going, they all knew the way of course and the other part was that we jumped all the lines, the security check points were different too, I got wheeled through two of them and got patted down on the other side, at LA they asked if I could walk through which I did, the only bad thing about the wheelchair was that it made me sit down for more hours, I think the whole trip took about 20 hours.
The first plane ride to Japan on JAL was nice, the flight attendants on JAL even carried my bags aboard for me, not like when I walked aboard the American Airlines flight, being the first on the plane I saw the flight attendants looking at magazines in the back, not that I needed the help but it just show the difference, I will chose a foreign airline when ever I can for any flights in the future.
They changed the seats for me on the plane from Japan to Dallas, they moved me to the first row of the cattle car section because of more leg room, that was nice at least, the only trouble with that is it is also the row where they put the baby's which there were three of, they screamed for 3/4's of the 11 hour flight so no sleeping for me, the good part of that was that the row in front of us was the back row of business section, these guys paid a lot more for the seats but still had to listen to the kids, it did make me smile. The seat I had looked straight the aisle so I watched how the other half live, business class sure drinks a lot.
When we were about an hour from landing the pilot came over the intercom and told us that about half way through the flight there was a mechanical problem with the plane which caused them to fly at a lower altitude and that made the plane use more fuel so we did not have enough fuel to reach Dallas and that we were going to land at LA instead, that worked out good for me because I was able to get a flight direct to Las Vegas which put me in there two hours earlier, if I had not changed flights they would have sent me to Dallas to catch my plane back to Vegas.
That was my trip home, hard but what choice was there, I would do it again in a heart beat for the most wonderful experience I have ever had.
This blew me away
Saturday, June 19, 2010 at 8:26pm
There is a girl here for SRS who is in the British Army, she is on leave right now so she is getting paid and when healed will return back to her command, she still has to pay for SRS herself but medications are paid for.
When I first met her I just thought that she used to be in the Army, I never thought that she could still be there, yes everybody knows about it and it's cool.
We are so far behind it sucks, even if we get rid of don't ask don't tell we will still be way behind this and how could I have not heard about this, this is something that I think should be known.
It still blows me away.
There is a girl here for SRS who is in the British Army, she is on leave right now so she is getting paid and when healed will return back to her command, she still has to pay for SRS herself but medications are paid for.
When I first met her I just thought that she used to be in the Army, I never thought that she could still be there, yes everybody knows about it and it's cool.
We are so far behind it sucks, even if we get rid of don't ask don't tell we will still be way behind this and how could I have not heard about this, this is something that I think should be known.
It still blows me away.
Blank
Friday, June 18, 2010 at 10:15pm
The last 2 days my mind has kind of been a blank of what to write, I looked at my calendar and saw that I had only been out of the hospital for a week, it has really felt more like 2 weeks but I have been having a nice time with the girls, normally when you are having a good time, time fly's by like on a weekend.
Yesterday I was doing things all day and then we had the hotel management cocktail party, it was not anything real big bit it was nice and I got to dress up for it too.
Today some of us are going over to the hospital to visit some of the girls there, something we try to do when we can walk enough, doctor say always " don't walk too much"
So see you later. Susan
The last 2 days my mind has kind of been a blank of what to write, I looked at my calendar and saw that I had only been out of the hospital for a week, it has really felt more like 2 weeks but I have been having a nice time with the girls, normally when you are having a good time, time fly's by like on a weekend.
Yesterday I was doing things all day and then we had the hotel management cocktail party, it was not anything real big bit it was nice and I got to dress up for it too.
Today some of us are going over to the hospital to visit some of the girls there, something we try to do when we can walk enough, doctor say always " don't walk too much"
So see you later. Susan
What the new heath care system did to me.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010 at 9:31pm
The week before I came to Thailand I had to make some big decisions about what to do about my medical insurance, what happened is that the Fire Department where I work has to renew the medical insurance every year by the end of June, I started getting emails and notes in my box at work to fill out new medical insurance applications because they were trying to find a cheaper insurance, I really don't like doing that in the first place because I don't need the whole world to know my business.
What happened next upset me then made me mad, first I was told was that the insurance was going to go up by 30% because of some people in the Department, what I did next I should not have done but I did because I did not think it was me, I asked the person who does this at the table with other people sitting around, was it because of me and she said yes and that we had been blackballed by other insurance company s so there was no chance of going anywhere else, all we could do is stay with the same company and pay 30% more with the deuductable doubled.
We have a small department with about 30 full time employees, young guys with family's who have a hard time now paying the copay, so what was going to happen when it goes up, something has to give.
I should say that the whole reason this is happening is because of the new insurance rules, in the old blue-cross rules nothing that happened to me because of compilation's from GID, hormones or surgery's was not covered, now I am covered and can not be dropped because of preexisting condition's and the way the insurance company is going to make that up is raising the cost.
OK so now everybody in the Department knows that because of me I was going to be taking money out of the pockets of everybody, this was not a good feeling on many levels.
Now what really pissed off the person doing all the work had forgotten from last year was that I had my retired military insurance so I was the only person who this was not going to effect too much but this made her mad because in her eyes I did not even need the department insurance that was now going to cost them so much money.
So what to do, I could do nothing and have both insurances which would probably make every body pissed at me and maybe more, or I could drop the department insurance which would help everybody except me or broker a deal which I did, I don't like it, I think it's wrong that I should have to do that but I think it was the right thing to do, I just hope it works out for everybody.
The week before I came to Thailand I had to make some big decisions about what to do about my medical insurance, what happened is that the Fire Department where I work has to renew the medical insurance every year by the end of June, I started getting emails and notes in my box at work to fill out new medical insurance applications because they were trying to find a cheaper insurance, I really don't like doing that in the first place because I don't need the whole world to know my business.
What happened next upset me then made me mad, first I was told was that the insurance was going to go up by 30% because of some people in the Department, what I did next I should not have done but I did because I did not think it was me, I asked the person who does this at the table with other people sitting around, was it because of me and she said yes and that we had been blackballed by other insurance company s so there was no chance of going anywhere else, all we could do is stay with the same company and pay 30% more with the deuductable doubled.
We have a small department with about 30 full time employees, young guys with family's who have a hard time now paying the copay, so what was going to happen when it goes up, something has to give.
I should say that the whole reason this is happening is because of the new insurance rules, in the old blue-cross rules nothing that happened to me because of compilation's from GID, hormones or surgery's was not covered, now I am covered and can not be dropped because of preexisting condition's and the way the insurance company is going to make that up is raising the cost.
OK so now everybody in the Department knows that because of me I was going to be taking money out of the pockets of everybody, this was not a good feeling on many levels.
Now what really pissed off the person doing all the work had forgotten from last year was that I had my retired military insurance so I was the only person who this was not going to effect too much but this made her mad because in her eyes I did not even need the department insurance that was now going to cost them so much money.
So what to do, I could do nothing and have both insurances which would probably make every body pissed at me and maybe more, or I could drop the department insurance which would help everybody except me or broker a deal which I did, I don't like it, I think it's wrong that I should have to do that but I think it was the right thing to do, I just hope it works out for everybody.
Believing it
Monday, June 14, 2010 at 5:02am
Every once in a wile and it's getting to be less now I have thoughts like I can't believe I did this, It's just that it has been so long in coming and I had put it out of my mind for so many years that I never thought it would happen, now that it has I don't think it has fully hit me yet, maybe when I get home or some little thing will make it hit me.
When I started my trip every step of the way here it would hit me that I was actually on my way, I had to think of other things just to keep the eyes dry, but when Sin picked me up at the airport I lost it.
After I have been home for awhile and back at work this may seem just like the best dream ever but with a difference, I will have my something that nobody can take away from me and new sisters that I will have something in common with for the rest of our lives.
Every once in a wile and it's getting to be less now I have thoughts like I can't believe I did this, It's just that it has been so long in coming and I had put it out of my mind for so many years that I never thought it would happen, now that it has I don't think it has fully hit me yet, maybe when I get home or some little thing will make it hit me.
When I started my trip every step of the way here it would hit me that I was actually on my way, I had to think of other things just to keep the eyes dry, but when Sin picked me up at the airport I lost it.
After I have been home for awhile and back at work this may seem just like the best dream ever but with a difference, I will have my something that nobody can take away from me and new sisters that I will have something in common with for the rest of our lives.
Feeling Special
Sunday, June 13, 2010 at 9:21pm
I have had the feeling of being special for the last 6 or 8 months and I do feel special still but now it's changed and really has nothing to do with SRS, these things were changing before, I guess we are in a state of constant change and more so with our special circumstances, I know that I am here in a concentrated point where many of us come for surgery and I could expect to meet many other girls like myself but after being here for about 2 weeks and meeting so many beautiful people I don't feel so special anymore, I feel normal, although we will always be special because it takes a special kind of person to go through what we do.
I have had the feeling of being special for the last 6 or 8 months and I do feel special still but now it's changed and really has nothing to do with SRS, these things were changing before, I guess we are in a state of constant change and more so with our special circumstances, I know that I am here in a concentrated point where many of us come for surgery and I could expect to meet many other girls like myself but after being here for about 2 weeks and meeting so many beautiful people I don't feel so special anymore, I feel normal, although we will always be special because it takes a special kind of person to go through what we do.
Removal
Thursday, June 10, 2010 at 8:21pm
Everything was removed this morning, it only took 15 mintues and a lot of that was him explaining things to me, didn't hurt at all.
I look like crap after laying here for 7 days so time for a good shower, fix my hair and makeup.
One thing I need to do before I leave is be able to pee.
All this is hard to think about doing be fore hand but once the time comes it's easy, don't worry over what there is nothing to worry about.
This is still not over for me, it still take about a year to fully heal from this and this is not my last operation.
I am feeling good, so good that I cry about just feeling good.
Susan
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Senza Pelo MedSpa Just wishing you well
June 11 at 10:57pm · LikeUnlike ·
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Denise Johnson Susan, I'm sooooo happy for you! *can't wait til it's my turn*
July 1 at 3:15am · LikeUnlike ·
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It just occurred to me
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Wednesday, June 9, 2010 at 2:49am | Edit Note | Delete
It just occurred to me I feel no sense of loss, never really thought I would but there is nothing at all, just another sign that this is right.
Updated about 2 months ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
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Mary Sakry and Michelle Hughes like this.
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Monique Lemmons thats because it was ment to be:)
June 9 at 7:43am via Facebook Mobile · LikeUnlike ·
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Mary Sakry OMG, no loss just becoming MORE the real YOU!
June 9 at 9:52am · LikeUnlike ·
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Everything was removed this morning, it only took 15 mintues and a lot of that was him explaining things to me, didn't hurt at all.
I look like crap after laying here for 7 days so time for a good shower, fix my hair and makeup.
One thing I need to do before I leave is be able to pee.
All this is hard to think about doing be fore hand but once the time comes it's easy, don't worry over what there is nothing to worry about.
This is still not over for me, it still take about a year to fully heal from this and this is not my last operation.
I am feeling good, so good that I cry about just feeling good.
Susan
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*
o
Senza Pelo MedSpa Just wishing you well
June 11 at 10:57pm · LikeUnlike ·
o
Denise Johnson Susan, I'm sooooo happy for you! *can't wait til it's my turn*
July 1 at 3:15am · LikeUnlike ·
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It just occurred to me
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Wednesday, June 9, 2010 at 2:49am | Edit Note | Delete
It just occurred to me I feel no sense of loss, never really thought I would but there is nothing at all, just another sign that this is right.
Updated about 2 months ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
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Mary Sakry and Michelle Hughes like this.
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Monique Lemmons thats because it was ment to be:)
June 9 at 7:43am via Facebook Mobile · LikeUnlike ·
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Mary Sakry OMG, no loss just becoming MORE the real YOU!
June 9 at 9:52am · LikeUnlike ·
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It just occurred to me
Wednesday, June 9, 2010 at 2:49am
It just occurred to me I feel no sense of loss, never really thought I would but there is nothing at all, just another sign that this is right.
It just occurred to me I feel no sense of loss, never really thought I would but there is nothing at all, just another sign that this is right.
Hospital day 5, I think, good drugs.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010 at 11:00pm
This morning I woke up at 3 am my time, that was OK because I fell asleep around 9pm, but what is there to do at 3am, so i plugged in my mp3 player and started to listen to 3 CD's that Marie had made for me about a year ago, well it didn't take long before I was crying again, it's funny how some of the smallest things can mean so much to you and I am not even on hormones.
today was a big day cause I was able to get out of bed after Dr Suporn checked me out, I did have to wait until 10am for the nurses to help me and make sure I didn't pass out after laying down for 5 days and with their help took my first shower and the first look at myself in the mirror, sure looks different but it is so swollen right now if I was to wear the wrong pants or whatever it would be the biggest Camel toe you had ever seen.
The IV was removed this morning, the connection is still there just in case so now I only have the one hose coming out of me, the drain was removed yesterday, the catheter gets removed the last day i think then you have to pee on your own or it gets put back in and have to walk around the hotel like that so the last day I am going to drink all the water I can.
After the shower I thought I was going to have to go back to bed but the nurse said i could go next door and visit with my friend Camila, we had only met the day she checked into the hospital, I had never met her before only on email, she had her operation the day before me, Camila is so beautiful in mind and body, I am looking forward to recovering with her.
I am back in my room now to rest then maybe a little walk about later.
One thing about the drugs, they don't coat them to make them taste good, they are nasty.
I took pictures but I am not going to show you.
Susan
This morning I woke up at 3 am my time, that was OK because I fell asleep around 9pm, but what is there to do at 3am, so i plugged in my mp3 player and started to listen to 3 CD's that Marie had made for me about a year ago, well it didn't take long before I was crying again, it's funny how some of the smallest things can mean so much to you and I am not even on hormones.
today was a big day cause I was able to get out of bed after Dr Suporn checked me out, I did have to wait until 10am for the nurses to help me and make sure I didn't pass out after laying down for 5 days and with their help took my first shower and the first look at myself in the mirror, sure looks different but it is so swollen right now if I was to wear the wrong pants or whatever it would be the biggest Camel toe you had ever seen.
The IV was removed this morning, the connection is still there just in case so now I only have the one hose coming out of me, the drain was removed yesterday, the catheter gets removed the last day i think then you have to pee on your own or it gets put back in and have to walk around the hotel like that so the last day I am going to drink all the water I can.
After the shower I thought I was going to have to go back to bed but the nurse said i could go next door and visit with my friend Camila, we had only met the day she checked into the hospital, I had never met her before only on email, she had her operation the day before me, Camila is so beautiful in mind and body, I am looking forward to recovering with her.
I am back in my room now to rest then maybe a little walk about later.
One thing about the drugs, they don't coat them to make them taste good, they are nasty.
I took pictures but I am not going to show you.
Susan
Checked into the Hospital
Thursday, June 3, 2010 at 4:43am
The day went fast, first I had breakfast with the girls then we went out shopping, it's hard to find a 220 volt hair dryer at home, the other reason I had to go out today was that I wanted to see where all the stores were at while I can still walk around easy, anyway that made a lot of the day go by fast.
At around 2:30 I went over to the clinic to fill out paper work and sign forms, after which I had my consultation with Dr Suporn, then to the hospital. Oh they gave me my dilators too, I am going to be seeing a lot of them soon.
So I was checked in to the hospital and all this is done for you, all I had to do was sit there and sign papers. then up to my room 903, I have been here for 2 hours now and had my blood pressure checked 3 times already. The psychiatrist came in and talked to me for the second letter, you get this paper and on one side I had to draw a women from head to toe, on the other side I had to draw a house with trees and people, then he asks you to explain your drawings to him, no I don't under stand but I passed and that's all that matters.
The anesthesiologist just came in and checked me out and explained a flew things.
Well tonight I think I get shaved, not like there is much there anyway and then the enema's, who's having all the fun now, the party starts around 9pm.
Surgery is at 8:30am and that's all you are going to hear from me for a while until I know which way is up again.
I am really not sure if I believe that I am really here, I know that I worked hard to get here, once I got started there was not much that could have stopped me, I have never known anything to be as right as this was in me.
I will try to write more later if I have time before I cross over to the other side.
The day went fast, first I had breakfast with the girls then we went out shopping, it's hard to find a 220 volt hair dryer at home, the other reason I had to go out today was that I wanted to see where all the stores were at while I can still walk around easy, anyway that made a lot of the day go by fast.
At around 2:30 I went over to the clinic to fill out paper work and sign forms, after which I had my consultation with Dr Suporn, then to the hospital. Oh they gave me my dilators too, I am going to be seeing a lot of them soon.
So I was checked in to the hospital and all this is done for you, all I had to do was sit there and sign papers. then up to my room 903, I have been here for 2 hours now and had my blood pressure checked 3 times already. The psychiatrist came in and talked to me for the second letter, you get this paper and on one side I had to draw a women from head to toe, on the other side I had to draw a house with trees and people, then he asks you to explain your drawings to him, no I don't under stand but I passed and that's all that matters.
The anesthesiologist just came in and checked me out and explained a flew things.
Well tonight I think I get shaved, not like there is much there anyway and then the enema's, who's having all the fun now, the party starts around 9pm.
Surgery is at 8:30am and that's all you are going to hear from me for a while until I know which way is up again.
I am really not sure if I believe that I am really here, I know that I worked hard to get here, once I got started there was not much that could have stopped me, I have never known anything to be as right as this was in me.
I will try to write more later if I have time before I cross over to the other side.
This is the start of a new set of notes from Thailand
Wednesday, June 2, 2010 at 4:27pm
One day to go, I knew I would be able to say that one day but it seemed like forever getting here.
To day I have to get cleaned up, then breakfast with the girls, after that going out to get money changed and pick up some things I need, also to see where things are at with Jerrilynn.
At noon I have to meet the van which will take me to the hospital to be admitted I guess then later I have to go back to the clinic to see Dr Suporn then back to the hospital for a week.
Tonight maybe my last post for 2 or 3 days, talk to you later. Susan
One day to go, I knew I would be able to say that one day but it seemed like forever getting here.
To day I have to get cleaned up, then breakfast with the girls, after that going out to get money changed and pick up some things I need, also to see where things are at with Jerrilynn.
At noon I have to meet the van which will take me to the hospital to be admitted I guess then later I have to go back to the clinic to see Dr Suporn then back to the hospital for a week.
Tonight maybe my last post for 2 or 3 days, talk to you later. Susan
Monday, July 26, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The Time is coming
I have 30 days until surgery, it's been a long time coming but it's almost here, people ask me if i am excited, I don't really think I am because I have been thinking about this for so long, it's more that I am ready, it's time. I do seem to be stressing out a bit though but that is because of all the things I have to plan and just hoping that I make it there and on time. The other thing is that all my bills have come this month and I am juggling the money.
Electrolysis is going good, I have had four mega sessions so far this year with another one the week before I leave, this is why I took out the line of credit so I would have the money to get other things done besides the surgery, my face is looking a lot better and it takes less time now to clear my face which is also good on the pocket book, the last time in it took about 1 1/2 days of two people working on me to clear the face.
Work is going along with no problems, it's just routine now, everybody seems to be used to me which takes some of the fun out of it.
The rest of my life is going along just like it should, I do every thing that a normal person does and that surprises me all the time, that I am able to live my life like this, I sometimes I can't believe that I am doing this and that tells me all the time that this is right for me, this is how I was supposed to be.
I did get some help from uncle Sam in the form of a nice tax return, I have plans for that, not going to say what those plans are right now, got to have some surprises.
Well that be all for now.
Susan
Electrolysis is going good, I have had four mega sessions so far this year with another one the week before I leave, this is why I took out the line of credit so I would have the money to get other things done besides the surgery, my face is looking a lot better and it takes less time now to clear my face which is also good on the pocket book, the last time in it took about 1 1/2 days of two people working on me to clear the face.
Work is going along with no problems, it's just routine now, everybody seems to be used to me which takes some of the fun out of it.
The rest of my life is going along just like it should, I do every thing that a normal person does and that surprises me all the time, that I am able to live my life like this, I sometimes I can't believe that I am doing this and that tells me all the time that this is right for me, this is how I was supposed to be.
I did get some help from uncle Sam in the form of a nice tax return, I have plans for that, not going to say what those plans are right now, got to have some surprises.
Well that be all for now.
Susan
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Tranny
The last time I came back from Phoenix from having electrolysis I had a little incident at the Safeway parking lot here in Havasu. Well when I come home I am usually not looking too good, I have my work hair on and no makeup because it's not good to put it on when your face is all torn up, but other than that I was dressed nice.
I came out of the store with my shopping cart, walked over to my car and this small white pickup truck had parked on the right side of me, there was two young guys in the front and another two in the bed of the truck, well I unloaded my bags into the trunk, then I pushed the cart over to the shopping cart area and that's when I heard something about "Tranny" I don't remember what all they said but it wasn't anything too bad, I got in my car and looked over at one of the guys in the bed of the truck, He gave me the universal single to show him my tits, well I just shuck my head and smiled, he smiled back and I was gone.
For me this is the first time I have been called Tranny out in pubic, it did not bother me at all, in fact I kind of liked it, maybe because they were paying me attention, not sure, I think it's all in the attitude and the way you handle things, I knew I was not looking too good that day but I had to go shopping so I could eat at work the next day or I would have put it off until I could look better.
I came out of the store with my shopping cart, walked over to my car and this small white pickup truck had parked on the right side of me, there was two young guys in the front and another two in the bed of the truck, well I unloaded my bags into the trunk, then I pushed the cart over to the shopping cart area and that's when I heard something about "Tranny" I don't remember what all they said but it wasn't anything too bad, I got in my car and looked over at one of the guys in the bed of the truck, He gave me the universal single to show him my tits, well I just shuck my head and smiled, he smiled back and I was gone.
For me this is the first time I have been called Tranny out in pubic, it did not bother me at all, in fact I kind of liked it, maybe because they were paying me attention, not sure, I think it's all in the attitude and the way you handle things, I knew I was not looking too good that day but I had to go shopping so I could eat at work the next day or I would have put it off until I could look better.
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